Fact: blankets keep you safe at night. We dont know what from, but they are definitely an immunity against something.
do you ever get in those moods where you don’t know how to feel and everything kinda feels mixed up and you’re just sitting there alone in your room trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with you
someone talking about math: I love some factorials
their friend: me too and the hypotenuse
me, interjecting: does this bus get off on 3rd street or am I on the wrong one? I only got on this bus because I thought the bus driver was attractive and now im trapped on a moving bus
"im sorry but i’m breaking u…"
reasons why halloween is the best holiday:
- you are not obliged to visit your relatives
- you are not obliged to get gifts for anyone
- people will give you candy for absolutely no reason other than halloween
- its the only day when its socially acceptable to go out in public dressed like a penguin
*7th grader voice from 2006* haha google blue waffle
(⊙︿⊙✿) WAIT I HAD HOMEWORK
don’t be a little shit to me on tinder
no mom im not a “shrek fan” im a brogre